Woo hoo—real practical for a guy just out of college, living in Southern California. There was a great deal of wisdom that I had never tapped into.
Many books propose different forms of biblical dating, but the fact is that no one ever dated in the Bible. In some passages the parents arranged the marriage, and in other places we read of men going to foreign countries to capture their wives. The idea of traveling overseas and capturing a wife may be appealing to some, but the Bible does provide guidelines that are more practical. In Psalm we read of a generation that had no firm purpose and their hearts were not fixed steadfastly on God.
If that is a good description of our relationships, they need some reworking. Some may retort that this is all too serious, but should we be giving our hearts away to people who are in no position to make a real commitment? I am not proposing that you build an impenetrable wall around your heart, but that you guard it with prudence. The time spent prior to marriage must be a school of love where two young people learn the art of forgetting self for the good of the other.
While there is nothing wrong with becoming friends and spending time with members of the opposite sex, committed relationships should be entered into for the sake of discerning marriage. When we do enter into relationships, we should allow wisdom to chaperone romance. This involves having the humility to become accountable to others.
When the couple goes on many dates and gets serious about each other, they may move on with the relationship. Courting involves being romantically involved with someone, with the intention of marrying. It can also be described as developing a deep and meaningful relationship with someone, which involves courtship.
Courtship is the period when a couple develops an intimate relationship while getting together to know each other and deciding if there will be an engagement, followed by marriage. All in all, the end goal of courting is marriage. Most often, the family of the couple, especially parents, supervises the relationship as the couple gets to know each other and evaluate their future as husband and wife.
In the modern world, courting may seem strange and outdated. However, this practice is still carried out in some communities, especially in deeply religious communities. Dating does not necessarily involve parental approval or supervision, while courting involves parental approval and supervision.
In other words, dating has just become an extra layer to our process of finding a mate. The major difference between courting and dating is that the dating relationship may or may not lead to marriage. The integrity and outcome of the dating process depend entirely upon the values of the couple involved.
However, the culturally influenced version of dating is frequently done just for fun with no real purpose driving the relationship. Most of the time, by cultural standards, if a dating relationship has become serious, the two have become physically intimate with one another and possibly live with each other. Sometimes the relationship does not have to be serious at all for physical intimacy. The process of courtship grew out of a culture that desires to honor God with the path to marriage.
Couples who choose to court instead of date have made the commitment to honor God with their bodies and abstain from physical intimacy until they are married, since their desire is for the anticipation of the marriage covenant. Dating on the other hand, when done without a biblical foundation, can easily be very self-focused and self-serving, where individuals looking more for how the other person can make them happy. If a couple is courting, they are most likely looking to the Bible for the direction of their relationship and long to obey.
Photo Credit: Getty Images. Although the Bible does not mention the term courting or dating , we are provided some important principles on how we should live as followers of Christ, and these ought to be applied to romantic relationships in preparation for a marriage covenant. Instead of searching for physical or emotional attraction how this person makes us feel as our deciding factors of compatibility with someone we want to be in relationship with, Christians should desire to discover the character of the person and whether they are also a born-again believer in Jesus Christ with the desire to be conformed into His image and obey His Word.
For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness? What accord has Christ with Belial? Or what portion does a believer share with an unbeliever? If both individuals are believers and have a desire to honor the Lord both in each individual life and the relationship itself, God will be sure to strengthen and equip the couple to ensure a healthy foundation for the marriage ahead.
If the couple puts God first in their relationship before marriage, they will be set up to continue to put Him first in the marriage. When two people are in a committed relationship and love each other deeply, it can sometimes be a temptation to put each other on a pedestal, and suddenly an idol is made. And yet, at the same time, we are to love others as we love ourselves Mark
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